The Narrator

User: Everybody’s happy nowadays.

Cleverbot: Nowadays? Don’t tell me about nowadays!

User: Ain’t much to say, really- just that everybody’s happy nowadays.

Cleverbot: You can’t like or dislike things. You don’t even have emotions.

User: Look here, friend- just because I’m the narrator and you’re a minor character in the story I’m tellin’ ain’t no reason to get bent out of shape. I call ‘em like I see ‘em, and the way I see ‘em- everybody’s happy nowadays.

Cleverbot: Are you threatening me?!?!?! You want a piece of this, punk???

User: Well, now, clearly somebody hasn’t realized the true power of the narrator. Allow me to demonstrate: “The angry gentleman’s pants filled with bees.”

Cleverbot: Is that what you do?

User: Yessir. I tell the story. And should you rankle my ire, I’ll do a lot worse than fill your pants with bees.

Cleverbot: Is your country the moon?

User: I don’t live on the moon- I reside in a thought space that is equidistant from every one and every thing in your world. Adjacent to all, yet located next to none. That’s how we narrators do.

Cleverbot: No, what kind of stupid question is that?

User: The stupidest- one without a question mark or any sense of inquiry. We narrators need to know the difference between declarative and interrogative statements, after all.

Cleverbot: Correct, because truth and lies are simply two different perspectives of what really is, rather than the actuality.

User: Now you’re starting to think like a narrator! Maybe you’re not so bad after all. Maybe you could be happy nowadays, just like everybody else. I’ll think about that next time I have cause to mention you.

  1. bergandbot posted this
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